Overcoming Sexual Sin

by Pastor Marvin R. Knight

“I have made a covenant with my eyes; how then could I gaze at a virgin?”
-Job 31:1

Here we discover Job doing something with himself that aided him in being a righteous man of God: he made a covenant with his eyes. Like a soldier standing on guard at a citadel, Job closed the gateway to his heart with his eyes—namely, that inlet of lust which inflames the heart. The seduction he hated caused him to put in place a rule he observed, which spoke of the motives he possessed.

The covenant that he made was with himself. What Job means by what he says is that he came to a fixed resolution, by which he guided his conduct, not to look upon a woman to lust after her. Why was this so important to Job that he made a sacred oath (covenant) with himself?

The answer, no doubt, lies in the fact that the Spirit of Christ revealed to him the spiritual offence and future destruction associated with sexual sin. Jesus highlights the danger of sexual sin when He said:

You have heard that it was said, “YOU SHALL NOT COMMIT ADULTERY”; but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye makes you stumble, tear it out and throw it from you; for it is better for you to lose one of the parts of your body, than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. If your right hand makes you stumble, cut it off and throw it from you; for it is better for you to lose one of the parts of your body, than for your whole body to go into hell. (Matt.5:27-30)

The words of Christ on adultery, divorce, and remarriage in Matthew chapter five ought to be taken together as a whole. The ideas in these verses are expressed in the strong language of Oriental imagery. The image sets before us a truth that we know very well. If it came to a choice between losing an eye or hand in life, or going to hell for eternity, there would be no hesitation in choosing the sacrificial act in life rather than losing our souls for eternity. Under surgical advice, a man will part with a limb or an organ to save his life. How much more should we be willing to sacrifice a sexual idol to save our souls! However, the choice is not as easy as it sounds. Why? Because of this one fact: it is connected with sexual sin.

Out of all of the sins that a man commits, sexual sin enters a man’s affections and wraps its coils around his entire life! It possesses an enslaving power which binds those who indulge in it (Prov.5:22; 2 Pet.2:10-19).

When a man engages in sexual sin, he cannot easily discard it. It penetrates deeper and deeper until it fills his whole soul (Prov.6:27-28).

However, its danger is so serious that it destroys not only a man’s physical body, but if he does not repent, it can result in the loss of one’s moral life, public reputation, and perhaps his spiritual life.

What does Jesus reveal about the danger of sexual sin?

Jesus reveals to us two facts that must never be forgotten:

1. The person who keeps on looking upon a woman in lust is trapped. His eyes have worked like a person’s foot that has tripped the stick of a trap so that he is captured or caught (“stumble,” Matt.5:29,is the Greek word “skandalizo,” which means tripped up). Eventually, the one who has done so will desire to dismiss his wife, although she is innocent of any moral unfaithfulness.
2. The repentance that is necessary will feel like poking your eye out or cutting your hand off. It will be so deep and difficult that it will be like saying goodbye to something you feel like you can’t live without.

Nevertheless, the Lord demands the removal of the offence from the place of affection that it has long held. Unless there is a thorough putting away of the offence, restoration is impossible. The aorist tense demands that there be a decisiveness of the action—once for all and forever. Why? Because complete shipwreck of your soul can occur on account of a sexual sin that is unpleasant to remove. For the Christian, whatever hinders our Christian life must go—any friendship, occupation, habit, even lawful or profitable activities.

Facing the Truth

It needs to be clear that Jesus is the only One truly capable of setting before us the definitive word on sin, its consequences, and its remedy. Up front, it may be helpful for you to know that the Lord Jesus never spoke of sin in an abstract or speculativetype of way. He never said, “it could be this or it might be that…” He spoke of sin in concrete and practicalterms. He did not see the issue of sin as a theory to be discussed. Neither did He look upon broken lives as cases to be treated, but rather, those who were broken by sin were brothers to be helped and individual sinners to be restored. This is why He had come. But let us not be mistaken; His view of sin is God’s view of sin and if you were to ask Him what sin meant to Him, He would say two things:

• Sin is a breaking of God’s law—and this law-breaking is much deeper than outward actions; it goes as far as the secret places of men’s hearts. As bad as sins of the flesh are, it was the spiritual sins—sins of the spirit, “respectable sins,” such as pride, selfishness, and a lack of love—that received the greatest rebuke. But to really understand what sin meant to Jesus is to get a hold of this fact: sin is not primarily something that a man does, but it is something he is (Matt.15:18-19).We are not sinners because we sin; we sin because we are sinners, and Jesus wants us to know that sin is a breaking of God’s law.

• But it is more. Sin is a blow at the loving heart of the Father; something He never minimizes. Sin is not just the violating of some impersonal rulebook; it is the hurting of love. Its shadow is seen in the story of the prodigal, as the Father suffers the pain of a sinful and willful son. It is like hammering another nail into the hands and feet of the Lord Jesus. It is the clenched fist raised up into face of God. It is a blow struck at the loving heart of God the Father.

What are the consequences of sexual sins?

Jesus spoke of sins that are often visited with outward penalties as well as inward results. Sin’s consequences are six-fold:

1. A bad conscience (Luke 15:21; John 8:9; Matt.26:75, 27:4-5)
2. An enslaved will (Luke 4:18; John 8:34)
3. A hardened heart (Heb.3:12)
4. A loss of fellowship with God (Luke 15:4, 13)
5. Pain and misery to others (Gal.6:7)
6. Judgment from God (Col.3:5-6)

Hitting Pornography Head-on

Pornography is an affair of the mind and a sin of the heart. It is sexual impurity, and sexual impurity begins in the desires of the heart. Jesus is not saying that lustful desires are identical to lustful deeds, and, therefore, if you have done one you should go ahead and do the other. The desires and the deeds are not identical, but, spiritually speaking, they are equivalent.

The look that Jesus mentions here is not a casual glance, but a constant stare with the purpose of lusting. It is possible for a man to glance at a beautiful woman and know that she is beautiful, but not lust after her. The man Jesus described looked at the woman for the purpose of feeding his inner sensual appetites as a substitute for the act. IT WAS NOT ACCIDENTIAL; IT WAS PLANNED. The question is: How do you change the plan?

Dealing With Sexual Sin at its Root

How do we get the victory? By purifying the desires of the heart and disciplining the actions of the body.

Self-mutilation is not the right method to avoid this temptation. The eyes and the hands are usually the two “culprits” when it comes to sexual sins, so they must be disciplined. Jesus said to deal immediately and decisively with sin! Don’t taper it off—cut it off! Spiritual surgery is more important than physical surgery—for the sins of the body can lead to eternal judgment! (Read Col.3:5; Rom. 6:13, 13:14) Refuse to give it consent in your heart. Stop the first risings of it. How? Again, by purifying the desires of the heart and disciplining the actions of the body.

How do we purify the desires of the heart? (Read Acts 15:9; Ps.119:9, 11)

How do you discipline the actions of the body? (Read 1 Cor.9:24-27)

The idea here is NOT that of some harmful treatment of the body or of self-torture, but rather a noble labor and self-denial for the sake of others. The danger we are seeking to avoid is the sad and tragic story of cultivating the spiritual growth of others while neglecting your own—and thus becoming a castaway from the truth you so boldly proclaimed. This discipline is fulfilled in a three-fold way:

• By practicing the truth that we already know (Matt.13:12)
• By diligently applying the means already ordained of God (Prov.2:4-5)
• By keeping an eye to the consequences (2 Tim.1:12)

Remembering the Chief Remedy

Jesus did not come to earth only to diagnose a malady, but also to prescribe and apply the remedy. The disease is sin—the cure, His cross and the transforming forgiveness and reconciliation that it brings!

2 Corinthians 5:21- “He made Him who knew no sin to be sin on our behalf, so that we might become the righteousness of God in Him.”

Don’t downplay or dismiss the glorious reality of forgiveness. Imagine being in such debt that it is impossible to ever meet your obligations, but then, by an act of sheer grace—having your debt wiped clean (Cf. Luke 7:42). This is what Jesus has made possible for all who believe and come to Him. No long period of probation—in a single moment you can go from fear and isolation with the most wasted and shriveled up soul to standing clean and joyful in the presence and arms of the God of the Universe!

Don’t forget, this is all of grace and God is the one who takes the initiative. It is God who comes at the time prescribed by infinite love and offers this pardoning love. It was so with Peter after His denial (Luke 22:61, 21:18-27),and it can be so with you!

This forgiveness and grace is not found in your repentance or your merits. Remember, the central place of forgiveness is found in Jesus and with His death on your behalf (Matt.20:28, 26:28).

Finally, when His forgiveness comes—Jesus always looks for two results in the lives of those who are forgiven. He looks for love (Luke 7:37ff)—ask the woman in Simon’s house. He also looks for goodness (Luke 19:8)—ask Zacchaeus. To know the forgiveness of Christ, dear friends, becomes the main drive for purity and dedication, which shapes and creates character and works righteousness!

Remember the progression of character formulation:

1. Sow a thought, reap a desire
2. Sow a desire, reap an act
3. Sow an act, reap a habit
4. Sow a habit, reap a character
5. Sow a character, reap a destiny

Your character now will be your character for eternity.

Revelation 22:11- “Let the one who does wrong, still do wrong; and the one who is filthy, still be filthy; and let the one who is righteous, still practice righteousness; and the one who is holy, still keep himself holy.”